


Due South Down South, Part II

by dsa_archivist



Category: due South
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 1999-05-06
Updated: 1999-05-06
Packaged: 2018-11-11 01:36:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11138610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dsa_archivist/pseuds/dsa_archivist
Summary: This story is a sequel toDue South Down South.





	Due South Down South, Part II

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Speranza, the archivist: this story was once archived at [Due South Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Due_South_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Due South Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/duesoutharchive).

Due South Down South, Part II

## 

Due South Down South, Part II

by: Karen Flieger

Note: See Due South Down South Pt. I for my copyright type disclaimer.

I am certain you are all wondering (if you read the first part) who all these people are (i.e. Karen, Jill, Ryan, Brian...) so I will give you a brief character sketch beginning with the first characters in order of appearance.

Still, you should know any Due South character if you followed the link this far!

The Rest of the Cast of Characters

Brian: Around eighteen years old, fairly intelligent, and sort of well...cute. Says his favorite Beatle is John, but looks and acts more like Paul. Brian is what some girls describe as adorably clueless, a description that could also match OFM. He even has his very own Victoria!

Ryan: A seventeen year old who is a bit reluctant about going into his senior year in high school. He has a girl friend as well.

Jill: A young woman of nearly twenty, Jill is Karen's best friend. Well, Jill is Karen's best girl friend. Brian and Ryan are her best boyfriends. Jill shares Karen's fondness for Due South and Brian, and introduced her to some other things such as "Monty Python and the Holy Grail."

Last, but not least...

Karen: That would be me. I'm about nineteen years old and a freshman at Kennesaw State University. I liked to write even before Due South, and the archive, but now I have someplace where my work is published!

Now for the story....

Once the introductions were made all around, and everyone had settled down enough for David/Ray to drive, Brian's thoughts began to center on food. He expressed these thoughts out loud, for that was part of the plan.

"Brian," Jill had started. "After she gets out of History, Karen will be starving. Suggest taking her out to a late lunch and call me, so that I can meet you guys there. One thing, NO Waffle House. Grits do not constitute what I would call a good birthday lunch."

"Can I take her to Red Lobster?" Brian had joked, knowing that the seafood place was not one of Jill's favorites.

"It may not be my birthday, but I would like to keep my lunch, thank you very much. Take her to T.G.I. Friday's or Ruby Tuesday's or even Chilli's or Applebee's. Maybe IHOP, but that's not much of a treat either." Jill had scoffed at Brian's jestful suggestion, but added some possibilities.

"Hey guys..." Brian sighed, is anyone besides me hungry?"

"Brian, you're ALWAYS hungry." Ryan grumbled. "Now help us figure out a way to keep Karen away from Jill's house."

"Where is she anyway?" Karen wondered again. "She said she'd pick me up and everything. This is NOT like Jill. She's hardly ever late."

"She said she'd meet us for a late lunch. Where do you want to go?" Brian asked, feeling his own stomach rumble.

"Um..I don't want to be too expensive, or too much of a burden, so let's just go to Ryan's steak house." Karen suggested.

"You have a steak house?" David/Ray teased Ryan.

"Oh, Ray. That was entirely too silly. Besides that, it's not at all amusing."

"I'll be the judge of what is and what isn't amusing, all right, Benny?"

"All right, Ray. I mean, if you are just going to sulk.."

"Who's sulking, Benny? Not me. I'm driving."

"All right, Ray. I understand. May I borrow your phone? I would like to call Inspector Thatcher. She wanted me to let her know how it was going."

"You're going to call a fictional character on a real telephone? This I gotta see!" David chuckled. "Don't forget, Paul, that we're just acting like Benny and Ray for fun and for one more day. Our show WAS cancelled, you do realize that, right Paul?"

"Understood, David." Paul mocked.

"All right then..." David sighed. "Everybody out."

"Wait, Dave. I do have to call Jill and let her know we got here. Blokes, take Karen with you." Brian said with about as much authority as a young man can have pretending to speak in a phony Ringo Starr- British accent. David parked the Riveria in the steak house parking lot.

"Oh, yeah, sure." David sighed. "Come on, Karen."

"Can I say hi to Jill at least? PLEASE, Bri?"

"Oh, how can I resist it when you beg like that." Brian laughed. "O.K. You can say hi to her, but then you get out. Understood?"

"Yeah, whatever." Karen agreed as Brian dialed the number.

"Hello. This is Jill, may I help you?"

"Hey. This is Brian. Karen wants to say hi."

"BRIAN! Wait, let me get outside. There's entirely too much noise out here. Why did you let her stay in the car?"

"She begged me. Look we're at Ryan's."

"You guys went back to Stadtmuller's house?" Jill said. "Well, Ryan does have a Nintendo..."

"Not RYAN'S!" Brian protested. "Ryan's Steakhouse!"

"Oh," Jill replied. "O.k. I'm outside now if you want to put Karen on."

"Here you go." Brian handed Karen the reciever.

"Hey, Karen."

"Hey, Jill. So what happened with you and Amanda there? Did she go back home or something?"

"Yeah. Listen, enjoy your lunch and I'll be right there. Go ahead and order without me. I know BRIAN has to be starving." Jill laughed.

"Isn't he always though? Honestly, and the way he never so much as gains a pound makes me sick to my stomach!"

"Hey, you should know better than to talk about me while I'm still sitting here." Brian protested, feigning visible hurt.

"Tell Brian I said, oh poor baby!" Jill sighed. "Just go and enjoy your lunch. All right?"

"O.k. I guess I'll see you when you get here." Karen agreed.

"Now get out of here so that I can talk to her. Besides, isn't it about time for Paul and Dave to do some Due South type things again?" Brian asked.

"Just about, yeah. Uh-oh." Karen saw something that might just mean trouble.

"Good uh-oh, or bad uh-oh?"

"Brian, uh-oh is ALWAYS bad." Jill informed. "Now what's wrong?"

"What is it, Karen?"

"Brian, you are not going to like this. Vicky's in there. With a guy."

"It's probably just John. Don't worry about it."

"Bri, would she do THAT with her brother?" Karen demanded after seeing Vicky and the young gentleman kiss each other on the lips. "I mean, I know she's totally into PDA's, but come on."

"What did you see?" Jill asked.

"Karen's imagination is really working overtime. She thinks she saw Vicky hitting on another guy. My Vicky!" Brian sighed.

"Brian, what did we all tell you about her?" Jill took a deep breath.

"Oh, come on. Nobody said anything about it to my face. I just thought people were making that stuff up, you know. Why would she treat me that way?"

Suddenly, Ryan and David, headed for the car.

"Brian, you've got to get out of here. I saw Vicky, and Vicky saw you out the window and Bri, you're cruisin' for a major brusin." Ryan shouted as Brian stepped out of the Riv.

Suddenly, a petite young woman stormed over to Brian and Karen in the Riveria.

"Just what the *hell* do you think you're doing with them? I am leaving in three days! You were supposed to spend today with me!" Her ebony hair frizzed with anger and she narrowed her denim blue eyes into lasers, attempting to cut her boyfriend's heart right open with only her gaze.

"I am going to just have to kill you." The girlfriend from *hell* decided.

"Look, I've spent plenty of time with you, Vicky." Brian began. "In the past year, I have spent each and every waking hour with you. It's a wonder you let me go to the bathroom by myself. I am almost an adult. Two days, Vic, and I'll be eighteen. That means independence from my parents, but I'm not too worried about them. They trust me enough to know that I am mature enough to live my own life. Today is my friend's birthday. She wanted me here, so I am here. She didn't stand in the way of me spending your birthday with you, did she?"

"She knows her boundaries. She's deathly afraid of me, but you know what? That's a good idea. Because I have this." Suddenly, Vicky pulled a gun from her purse.

"You're lucky I'm not a real cop." Dave cracked.

"I know. Now, you get away from that car, Brian. Nice and slow. I don't want to have to hurt you too."

Suddenly, a familair figure in a red Mountie serge and a tan Stetson hat emerged, holding up his hand.

"Hello, I am Constable Benton Fraser of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. Please put your gun on the ground and come with me quietly."

"Paul, what are you doing?" David asked.

"Ah, Ray. I'm glad you're here. Arrest this young woman for assault with a deadly weapon."

"I'd love to BENNY, but I don't think we can." David sighed.

"On what grounds, Ray?"

"On the grounds that we're not real cops. We're actors, remember?" David sighed. "Did you hit your head or something?"

"My head is fine, Ray, but thank you kindly for asking."

"You're all even crazier than I am!" Vicky hissed. "I'm getting out of here."

Vicky got into her car and left.

"Pretty smooth move there, Benny. I gotta hand it to you. You really scared the stuff out of that girl." David complimented, as Paul/Fraser removed his hat.

"David? Did you say something?" Paul asked with a quizzical expression in his bright green eyes.

"Yeah, Benny. That was good. You really scared that girl out of killing those kids that was really great."

"I am not Benny. Well, not anymore anyhow." Paul sighed, tracing the brim of the hat. "I'll miss him though. We had a good couple of seasons."

"When we were on." David added. "Don't forget how many times they pre-empted us."

"Maybe just one more time, eh, Dave? Then, no more." Paul placed the Stetson back on his head.

"It really does suit you, Paul." Karen agreed.

"You mean Benton."

Brian was amazed. "So, you mean to say whether you wear your hat or not determines when you're in character?"

"I am always in character, Brian."

"No you're not." Ryan agreed, as Brian took the Stetson of Invulnerability off of Paul/Fraser's head.

"Let's try a little experiment, shall we?" Brian suggested, putting the Stetson on his own head.

Everyone stood, waiting, but nothing happened.

"Hey, guys, I guess I'm still pretty much me, huh?" Brian sighed.

"Yup, that's all." David agreed.

"It only works on me. It's psychological. It's sort of like sense memory. This hat, this nice, clean, neat hat symbolizes Fraser. In my mind, whenever I put this hat on, I have to act like Fraser because if I ever put this hat on for something else it could ruin my train of thought. When I'd put it back on, I wouldn't be able to get in character with it." Paul explained. "When we were on the IRC a few months ago, someone asked how I got into character. I told them that I put on the suit."

"Oh, well. I guess you can have it back then, Paul." Brian sighed, putting the hat back on Paul's head.

"Thank you kindly, Brian. Well, Ray, we must be going now. Happy birthday, Karen."

"Tell Diefenbaker and Thatcher and everyone that we said hi." Karen sighed, giving Fraser and David hugs. "Thank you so much for coming."

"Well, thanks for having us. It was fun." David agreed, and Fraser/Paul took the hat back off.

"Good night. I have to get back to Chicago soon. I have an audition for E.R. in the morning." Paul sighed.

"What are you auditioning for?" Brian asked.

"A wounded Mountie." Paul answered.

"You've had enough practice." David agreed.

As the Riveria pulled away, Jill walked up to Karen. "Hey, Happy Birthday. Where did the guys go?"

"Back to Canada. They have to film the series finale. Just in case they never get picked up again." Karen sighed. "But Paul might be on E.R.!"

"You mean I missed them?" Jill cried.

"Yup." Ryan sighed. "Just left."

"Oh, well. It's nothing a little chocolate cake can't fix. Let's go to my place and watch some Monty Python." Jill sighed, letting Karen into her car.

"Nee!" Brian and Ryan shouted.

"Maybe we'll watch a little Due South too." Jill sighed. "This DSWS is killing me!"

THE END


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